Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Monday, October 6, 2008
My Financial To Do List
Given the current state of the economy, and given the fact that my husband is CARELESS with personal finances, tomorrow's to do list is as follows(subtitles in all caps):
Let's see how I can get $10,000 by Friday...
I shit you not.
• Call Fidelity and discuss status of pension
WHERES MY MONEY, BITCH?
value: $7500ish
• Call VistaPrint and discuss why they have been charging us for 12 months
WHY YOU TAKIN MY MONEY, BITCH?
value: $225ish
• Submit FSA reimbursement from dental bill
I NEED ME SOME MONEY, BITCH
value: $1200ish
• Call husband at work and harass him into calling the jewelers, both, to refund monies or issue credits
IT'S BEEN OVER A YEAR, BITCH
value: $150 & $200
• Call husband at work and harass him into bringing change to change room
YOUR COMPANY IS OWNED BY A BANK,BITCH alt title OR I'M BRINGING IT ALL TO COINSTAR, BITCH
value: $600ish
• Collect all merchandise credits, gift cards etc throughout house
WE COULD BE SPENDIN SOMEONE ELSE'S MONEY, BITCH
value: $400ish
• Collect all returns, mis-purchases, and things to be donated throughout house
I’M GONNA GET ME SOME O’ MY MONEY BACK, BITCH
value: $125ish
• Call Wells Fargo and change my legal name on the mortgage
YOU TRICKED ME INTO A SUBPRIME LOAN, BITCH
value: none. Just needs to be done
Let's see how I can get $10,000 by Friday...
I shit you not.
• Call Fidelity and discuss status of pension
WHERES MY MONEY, BITCH?
value: $7500ish
• Call VistaPrint and discuss why they have been charging us for 12 months
WHY YOU TAKIN MY MONEY, BITCH?
value: $225ish
• Submit FSA reimbursement from dental bill
I NEED ME SOME MONEY, BITCH
value: $1200ish
• Call husband at work and harass him into calling the jewelers, both, to refund monies or issue credits
IT'S BEEN OVER A YEAR, BITCH
value: $150 & $200
• Call husband at work and harass him into bringing change to change room
YOUR COMPANY IS OWNED BY A BANK,BITCH alt title OR I'M BRINGING IT ALL TO COINSTAR, BITCH
value: $600ish
• Collect all merchandise credits, gift cards etc throughout house
WE COULD BE SPENDIN SOMEONE ELSE'S MONEY, BITCH
value: $400ish
• Collect all returns, mis-purchases, and things to be donated throughout house
I’M GONNA GET ME SOME O’ MY MONEY BACK, BITCH
value: $125ish
• Call Wells Fargo and change my legal name on the mortgage
YOU TRICKED ME INTO A SUBPRIME LOAN, BITCH
value: none. Just needs to be done
Sunday, October 5, 2008
???
A token of his eternal presence . . .He Walks With Me Pendant
Diamond . . . 14K Gold over Sterling Silver
The comforting words of a favorite hymn inspired this sterling silver and 14K Gold-plated sandal pendant by award winning designer Thomas Sota . . . featuring a Diamond cross and tiny footprints that remind us of his eternal presence and guidance.
The back of the sandal is beautifully engraved with the phrase, “He walks with me.”
The sandal measures 1 inch by 1/2 inch. A complimentary 18” chain is included.
Just $37.50
Plus $4.95 Shipping & Handling
Hitting it Old School
I'm on the phone with my sister tonight. I mention that I tapped Ellie across the foot today. Hard.
We have a no kicking policy. I understand that she needs to express herself, that no one likes being flat on their back ala WWF and getting their ass wiped with a cold damp scented cloth (hence the expression cool as a cucumber??), I realize she's having fun and doesn't want me to interrupt it. Etc.
But it's not ok to kick. Not mommy, not daddy, not tummies, not ever. Unless you are over the age of 21 walking in the North End and in fear for your virginity. (A 21 year old virgin? A feat in itself. All puns intended.)
The rule is, she gets a warning. Several. A stern admonishment. We look each other in the eye. Then, if there's another kick, one that appears malicious and not just a synapse misfiring or a tiny mind taking an extra second to process, the offending leg gets captured and it's two fingers against the flat of her foot. Pointer and middle, not ring, so there's some force. She gets a tap. Then a "No Kicking". Then we move on. She cries, I ignore it. She stops kicking. I pick her up, she gets a kiss and a hug, a good girl, then down she goes and off she toddles.
I have heard the reports that hitting is setting her up for a codependent relationship. That the one who hits (aka me) is also the one that comforts. So I fully realize that years from now, she'll be in love with a drunk named Marty, who only hits her every four months then tells her it's her fault. The therapist will point to me. She'll tell her future husband. The one she meets seven years into therapy - after she kicks Marty out. They'll both be glad I was old as dirt when I had her and soon to be dead so they don't have to forgive me. Etc etc.
I read the Slate article on corporal punishment. I've read the articles about human rights. That we don't afford those under 18 the same respect as those older. Etc etc.
I feel bad.
I wonder.
I worry.
I mention it is passing. Conversationally. Adjunct to something my sister has said.
"Yeah. I tapped Ellie across the foot today. Hard."
"Um hmm" my sister says "Wha'd she do?"
"She kicked me in the stomach. We have a zero tolerance policy around kicking."
My sisters quiet. Is she listening or condemning? I continue "I know, there's all these articles that say that once you hit them once, it escalates. That you get desensitized to it."
"Oh good." She said. "Then you won't feel as guilty when she's older and you really need to whack her."
We have a no kicking policy. I understand that she needs to express herself, that no one likes being flat on their back ala WWF and getting their ass wiped with a cold damp scented cloth (hence the expression cool as a cucumber??), I realize she's having fun and doesn't want me to interrupt it. Etc.
But it's not ok to kick. Not mommy, not daddy, not tummies, not ever. Unless you are over the age of 21 walking in the North End and in fear for your virginity. (A 21 year old virgin? A feat in itself. All puns intended.)
The rule is, she gets a warning. Several. A stern admonishment. We look each other in the eye. Then, if there's another kick, one that appears malicious and not just a synapse misfiring or a tiny mind taking an extra second to process, the offending leg gets captured and it's two fingers against the flat of her foot. Pointer and middle, not ring, so there's some force. She gets a tap. Then a "No Kicking". Then we move on. She cries, I ignore it. She stops kicking. I pick her up, she gets a kiss and a hug, a good girl, then down she goes and off she toddles.
I have heard the reports that hitting is setting her up for a codependent relationship. That the one who hits (aka me) is also the one that comforts. So I fully realize that years from now, she'll be in love with a drunk named Marty, who only hits her every four months then tells her it's her fault. The therapist will point to me. She'll tell her future husband. The one she meets seven years into therapy - after she kicks Marty out. They'll both be glad I was old as dirt when I had her and soon to be dead so they don't have to forgive me. Etc etc.
I read the Slate article on corporal punishment. I've read the articles about human rights. That we don't afford those under 18 the same respect as those older. Etc etc.
I feel bad.
I wonder.
I worry.
I mention it is passing. Conversationally. Adjunct to something my sister has said.
"Yeah. I tapped Ellie across the foot today. Hard."
"Um hmm" my sister says "Wha'd she do?"
"She kicked me in the stomach. We have a zero tolerance policy around kicking."
My sisters quiet. Is she listening or condemning? I continue "I know, there's all these articles that say that once you hit them once, it escalates. That you get desensitized to it."
"Oh good." She said. "Then you won't feel as guilty when she's older and you really need to whack her."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)