Monday, October 6, 2008

My Financial To Do List

Given the current state of the economy, and given the fact that my husband is CARELESS with personal finances, tomorrow's to do list is as follows(subtitles in all caps):

Let's see how I can get $10,000 by Friday...
I shit you not.

• Call Fidelity and discuss status of pension
WHERES MY MONEY, BITCH?
value: $7500ish
• Call VistaPrint and discuss why they have been charging us for 12 months
WHY YOU TAKIN MY MONEY, BITCH?
value: $225ish
• Submit FSA reimbursement from dental bill
I NEED ME SOME MONEY, BITCH
value: $1200ish
• Call husband at work and harass him into calling the jewelers, both, to refund monies or issue credits
IT'S BEEN OVER A YEAR, BITCH
value: $150 & $200
• Call husband at work and harass him into bringing change to change room
YOUR COMPANY IS OWNED BY A BANK,BITCH alt title OR I'M BRINGING IT ALL TO COINSTAR, BITCH
value: $600ish
• Collect all merchandise credits, gift cards etc throughout house
WE COULD BE SPENDIN SOMEONE ELSE'S MONEY, BITCH
value: $400ish
• Collect all returns, mis-purchases, and things to be donated throughout house
I’M GONNA GET ME SOME O’ MY MONEY BACK, BITCH
value: $125ish
• Call Wells Fargo and change my legal name on the mortgage
YOU TRICKED ME INTO A SUBPRIME LOAN, BITCH
value: none. Just needs to be done

1 comment:

Kim said...

Just a word of warning, when I went to change my name on my mortgage, they were going to charge me a fee for filing an affidavit for a new name. So I said, "Screw you and your affidavit fee, bitch."

I ended up refinancing, so I'm not sure if I did end up paying that fee or not. I probably did, but with all those itemized things at the closing, there's no way of knowing for sure.

Good luck getting your $10K, bitch!